Women often feel sexually coerced when it comes to dealing with their male counterparts. We are not saying that every woman in every relationship is having forced sex. We are simply stating that women sometimes fall victim to coercion even without knowing it.
That’s why it is essential to know which of the following is an example of sexual coercion? We will give you some practical instances that you may face now and then. It will be easier that way to differentiate between consent sex and coerced sex.
What Is Sexual Coercion? How Does It Differ From Sexual Assault?
Before we jump to which of the following is an example of sexual coercion, let’s define the term first. Without identifying what the phrase means, we can’t judge when we are being coerced and not.
Let us start by saying that sexual coercion is not as easy to identify as sexual assault. You don’t always have to face physical aggression from your partner. However, if someone blackmails you emotionally and forces you to have sexual contact against your will, that’s also coercion.
So, let’s state the most obvious fact. You will feel sexual coercion by the person with whom you have some kind of relationship. A stranger cannot sexually coerce you because they don’t know you. So, if they want to have sexual contact with you, they will have to apply physical force. In that case, it will be sexual assault according to criminal law.
But, someone who knows you will likely commit sexual coercion. In many instances, they will make you feel like it’s too late to say no or may use alcohol to lower your guards. If they have long wanted to make sexual contact with you and have been unsuccessful, they will try this.
Which Of The Following Is An Example Of Sexual Coercion?
We have already identified what sexual coercion is. We have also identified how sexual coercion is different from sexual assault. So, now it’s time to look at a few examples and judge which of the following is an example of sexual coercion.
You are in a relationship with someone for some time now. The guy has asked you for sex many times till now. He takes you on dates, pays for your meal, gives you gifts, and claims he loves you very much. You have said no to him till now, but he says if you love him, you won’t object to it. You somehow feel obligated because he has done so many things for you and ends up agreeing to the situation.
It is an example of sexual coercion because the guy feels you are obligated to repay him by having sex with him.
You are drinking alcohol with your boyfriend, you are pretty drunk at the end of the session, and your boyfriend takes you back to his apartment. You may have willingly consented to stay at his apartment also. Now, he initiates sex with you. When you say no, he says it’s too late, and you have got him all worked up.
It is an example of sexual coercion because the guy thinks he has some authority over you just because you got drunk with him.
You work hard at your company. But, somehow, when the time comes for promotion, your name never pops up in your boss’s mind. You decide to confront him. He says that there are other things you can do to get promoted or to stay at the job. You say no to him, and he threatens to terminate you.
It is also an example of sexual coercion because the boss threatens your employment and promises to reward you with something you already deserve in exchange for sex.
How To Respond When You Are Sexually Coerced?
If you have already figured out which of the following is an example of sexual coercion, it’s time to move past that. If you think you are having forced sex, learn to respond appropriately in that situation. Speak up, fight back, or leave the place if you can when someone is forcing them on you.
Don’t think you will hurt the relationship, and give in to something you don’t want to do. Instead, be direct in your statement, stand firm on your position, and say ‘No.’ If someone in a powerful position tries to coerce you, leave that place as fast as possible.
You can indeed choose to leave the workplace and find a new job. But that will mean you are indulging the person in committing the same kind of sin again with someone else. It’s better to report that person to a higher authority if you can.
What To Do If You Don’t Know Which Of The Following Is An Example Of Sexual Coercion?
Someone may try to take you on a guilt trip and use that to have sex with you. They may say that not having sex can hurt your relationship even when you said no to them. In fact, they may threaten to lie about you or spread rumors about you. They may threaten your family members or your career or threaten to reveal your sexual orientation.
Are you unsure which of the following is an example of sexual coercion? Let us clear the air. All of these instances are instances of sexual coercion. You may not understand it if you are below 18. If you don’t have much sexual experience yet, you might not differentiate between consensual and forced sex.
In that case, you should talk to a trusted adult. Describe the entire scenario to them, and listen to their advice. You can also call 911 if you are in immediate danger. You can also talk to your HR or a friend if you are not sure what to do. Finally, if none of these options seem to be working for you, call the National Sexual Assault Hotline. Thus, you can collect help from the experts anonymously.
How To Differentiate Between Consensual Sex and Forced Sex, When Alcohol Is Involved?
Suppose you are drinking alcohol with your partner. After some time, both of you got in the mood. He approached you, and you reciprocated the situation.
Now, take another incident. You are drinking alcohol with your partner. After a certain amount of drinks, he tries to entice you sexually by touching you. You figure it out but hint to him that you are not interested in sex.
Are you wondering now which of the following is an example of sexual coercion? The former is consensual sex, and the latter is forced sex.
First, it looks consensual if you don’t say ‘No’ to your partner and enjoy sex with him. You can’t blame the person in the morning that he forced you.
But in the second case, when your partner understands you are not interested, he should have stopped. Even if you had sex with him at that moment, it was coerced because the guy chose to ignore your hints.
Are you pondering over which of the following is an example of sexual coercion? Let us answer some of your quick questions.
1: I Did Not Want To Have Sex With My Boyfriend. But, I Ended Up Having It Under Alcoholic Intoxication. I Don’t Remember Saying No To Him Either. Was I Coerced?
Ans: If you don’t remember saying no to him, we can’t know that you were coerced. Since both of you were drunk, we can’t blame your boyfriend also for forcing you. But, we advise you to drink moderately next time so that you at least remember what happens to you.
2: If I Am Married To Someone, Is It Mandatory For Me To Have Sex With Him When He Wants?
Ans: Not. Being married does not snatch your independent right to say ‘No’ to things you don’t want. If he makes you feel like you must have sex with him, you are being coerced.
3: My Boss Promised Me A Promotion In Exchange For Having Sex With Him. But, He Did Not Stand By His Promise When We Had It Already. Can I Complain Against Him?
Ans: Yes, you can complain against him. But you can’t put him behind bars for this crime. That’s because you are an adult, and even though you were coerced, you agreed on this thing instead of saying ‘No.’
Wrapping It Up
Are you still thinking about which of the following is an example of sexual coercion? If your confusion is still not apparent, we think you must take the help of a professional counselor. Maybe your situation is more complex than we described here. It may also happen that you have been having coerced sex with your boyfriend, and it just got cleared up for you. Whatever the case is, talk to someone you trust before making any other decision. If you have more queries for us, post them in the comment section below.